


May your days be merry and bright

by starsinoureyes



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Canon?, Christmas Cookies, Christmas Fluff, Harry is basically a cooking making machine, Hot Chocolate, Ice Skating, Kid Fic, Louis works very hard, M/M, some smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-12
Updated: 2014-12-12
Packaged: 2018-03-01 05:28:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,027
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2761346
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starsinoureyes/pseuds/starsinoureyes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Louis promises ice skating and hot chocolate, Harry promises mistletoe kisses and fresh baked cookies, the kids promise to be  up at the crack of dawn Christmas morning.<br/>It's the happiest time of the year.</p>
            </blockquote>





	May your days be merry and bright

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ohbullship](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ohbullship/gifts).



> I sincerely hope this is not too disappointing. It was written last minute because I'm a horrible procrastionator so any mistakes are...ugh. I'm sorry.  
> Out of all three prompts I decided to stick with the Christmas theme because I'm feeling Christmassy for the last month.  
> This is also my first time writing for a fic exchange so...(excuses, excuses, excuses)  
> Enjoy!

Five thousand one hundred and ten days. 5110 in numbers. That is how many days Harry has been with Louis. More or less. Out of all these magnificent, sad, exciting, frustrating and extraordinary days they have spent exactly 14 Christmases together. Hopefully there will be lots and lots of Christmases they will spend together in the future, but there is one Christmas Harry holds dear to his heart. It’s his favourite Christmas with Louis and the kids ever.

Actually, it wasn’t just the Christmas Day that was special, now that Harry thinks about it more clearly, it was everything that led up to that perfect Christmas. That Christmas _morning_.

It started right about two weeks before December 25th.

~

Laboured breathing was all you could hear in the early hours of that Monday morning. Sounds of rustling of the soft cotton sheets were blending with pants in the king-sized bed of their Doncaster home. The rain pounded heavily outside and knocked on the large windows opposite their bed (which now had curtains over them).

“Oh God.” Louis moaned loudly right into Harry’s ear as Harry thrusted forward sloppily and grazed his prostate. “Right there. Don’t stop, Haz.” Harry hitched Louis’ legs higher around his hips and then balanced on his forearms on top of him. Harry’s heart fluttered excitedly when he saw Louis’ lustful stares, but the smile that was stretched over his lips was of pure adoration and love.

They were at their prime – sexually and relationship-wise. They have pulled down barriers and insecurities that lingered in the last ten years when it came to one another. In the last five years since they moved to Doncaster (Louis moved back J ) Harry noticed that gradual change. It was always a bit hectic and spontaneous, especially each time they got a new baby, and it put a strain on their relationship. But it seems to Harry - now that they’ve built all this and settled finally how they’ve always wanted – he’s at peace. With himself and how he feels about Louis. It has grown like ivy inside of him, steadily and carefully but instead of suffocating him like he always thought it would (overwhelm would be a better word, Louis never suffocated him), it filled him with confidence and clarity.

It also excited him that even after fourteen years of being with Louis he could still have butterflies or get heart palpitations. Even after fourteen years, Louis still excited him.

“Unnngh….mmhm…” Louis mumbled against Harry’s lips as Harry tried to repeat the angle from before. The smack of their kisses and sounds of sweaty skin being pressed together rivalled the steady thumps coming from outside because rain was getting heavier with each minute.

Harry’s eyes kept coming back to his husband’s each time he tried to absorb nuances of his face. They were so expressive. He also needed to speed things up or the kids will wake up soon and come to the locked doors. He hated doing that, he wanted for their kids to know they can come to him at any time of the day if needed but it was the only way Louis and he could get any privacy these days.

“Aaah…” Louis happily moaned when Harry doubled his efforts and made Louis see stars out of delight (and spill on his abs). Harry felt his blunt fingernails dig into his back and he came suddenly, shaking on top of Louis as he slowly calmed down.

Louis’ warm breath hit the top of Harry’s forehead and he felt his slim fingers caress his back up and down, easing the pain they inflicted few minutes ago. Harry pushed himself back slightly to take off the condom and he threw it on the side of the bed, not looking if it fell in the bin. Louis smiled cheekily at him but didn’t say anything, just pulled him down beside him and kissed his sweaty forehead.

They were silent for a while, bathing in the post-coital peace and warmth with occasional happy sighs.

“What do you think the kids want for Christmas?” Louis whispered against Harry’s forehead while lazily pulling his fingers around Harry’s forearm. Harry snorted and looked up at him.

“Lou, it’s only two more weeks till Christmas. Please tell me you didn’t plan on buying everything at the last minute. Like you always do.”

Louis looked at him mock offended. “Please, Harold. I’m never late to do anything. I do them at the right time and when I’m supposed to. And you said it yourself – I still have two more weeks.”

“I’ll remind you in a week.” Harry mumbled against Louis’ chest.

 “Please do.” Louis said and pulled him closer.

 

Few weeks before Christmas and all up to the week after New Year’s are always hectic, no matter who you are or what you do for a living, and it wasn’t anything different in the Tomlinson-Styles household. The kids are preparing for the holidays and have tons of homework to do before this semester even ends and Louis and Harry have their jobs.

So, to not completely lose his head Harry always cuts back on the hours he has to spend in the office of HSA Publishing this time of the year and focuses more on his children and holiday chores. Louis unfortunately doesn’t have that ‘luxury’ and sometimes his working hours stretch into late at night when Matty and Amelia are already sleeping in their respective beds. Those are the worst days and Harry wants to be an understanding husband but sometimes it’s rather difficult to see why a director of football is needed from 8am to 11pm some days.

When Harry’s nagging reached the limit of Louis’ patience after he explicitly told him that “he can’t discuss the club’s private matters” for the thousandth time, Louis picked up his laptop case and dropped a pile of papers in Harry’s lap (“You deal with all that then!”). It happened in one of the early years after they withdrew from an active singing career and Amelia was born. These days Harry is just as busy with his publishing company/record label and he is more understanding of Louis’ job (that doesn’t keep him from complaining sometimes how late Louis got home last night).

 

This is where Harry was then: at their home, vacuuming the living room and listening to the radio softly playing from the kitchen. He officially presented his annual notice of ‘holiday absence’ yesterday to the rest of the board and he could breathe easily now. There was only two more hours until he had to pick up the kids from school and Louis was at the club. He cherished moments like these but he also missed how loud the house got when all four of them were here. Then he was mentally choosing between surprising Amelia with chocolate cookies and having a glass of wine while listening to the old Arctic Monkeys records.

It was a no-brainer really. He knew how much Amelia (and Louis) love his cookies. He put away the vacuum cleaner and opened the windows to get some of the stuffy air out, then put the apron (joined present from his family for his 30th birthday) with dandelions on and started to bake cookies from scratch.  

The moment Harry closed the back door on his Range Rover and fastened seatbelts on both of his children, Amelia started babbling on what she learned that day. She recited exactly what happened from the moment Harry dropped her off in front of her classroom till he picked her up. Her dark brown hair was so long it was starting to curl at the ends ( _my baby_ , Harry said to Louis when he first noticed) and it danced in time with her enthusiastic head shakes. He listened to her in amusement and drove to their house, keeping an eye on the traffic and Matthew who was deeply engrossed in the book he was reading, moving his lips distractedly.

“…and then Timmy didn’t want to come back in the class because it started to snow. He’s silly, daddy, and in Art we had to colour our favourite winter acti-activee…”

“Activity, darling.” Harry supplied for his daughter and turned left in their street.

“Activeetee.” Amelia repeated carefully, tasting the word. “Yes. I was colouring a snowman and Timmy was playing with glue and hit Margaret’s chair.”

Harry smiled at her in the rear-view mirror. “Do you have the drawing with you?”

Amelia shook her head sadly with a pout. “No. Ms Wheatly said she’ll put them on our board for the holidays. I wanted to show you and daddy. I even coloured inside the lines!”

Harry stopped the car in their driveway and shut the engine. “Maybe you can do it again? Matty can draw you a big snowman and you can colour it, huh?”

Matty looked up from his book and stared at Harry confusedly. “Huh? What?” Harry smiled widely and pleadingly at him. Amelia looked at her big brother with excited eyes.

“You can help your sister with drawing a snowman, can’t you? We can put it on the fridge.” Harry said and Matty snorted.

“Me? I have other things to do, not draw stupid snowmen.”

“Matty, come on. She’s your sister.” Harry pleaded and Matty closed his book demonstratively.

“So? She goes to school now. She can do it on her own.” Amelia looked at him angrily and smacked him on his arm.

“Amelia!” Harry reprimanded and unfastened her seatbelt quickly before they grabbed at each other.

“Who needs you anyway?” Amelia snapped and reached for Harry. “You’re stupid. And you smell.” She tucked her head in the crook of Harry’s neck and hugged Harry tightly. Matty sighed in his seat and slowly got out of the car, and into the house. Harry watched him sadly and walked after him, both his and Amy’s rucksack in one hand while supporting his daughter with the other.

“He’s mean.” Amelia mumbled into his neck when Harry closed the front door and entered the warm house. “Why do we keep him? He never plays with me. He always reads his stupid books.”

Harry slowly detached her from his body and put her on the ground. “We can’t get rid of him, Boo.” Harry laughed at her words, “he’s your brother. You’ll be very sad if he leaves.”

“No, I won’t.” Amelia insisted and turned towards the kitchen. “Are those cookies?”

Harry smiled and guided her towards her room upstairs instead. “Change your clothes first. Then you can have some.”

“Chocolate?” Amelia’s eyes widen in anticipation. Harry nodded and she stomped excitedly towards her room.

 

Some time later Matty emerged from his room with a book under his arm and joined Harry and Amelia who were happily drawing on her small drawing table in the kitchen. He watched them for a moment before he sat on the tall stool next to the kitchen island.

“Matty, you want to join us?” Harry asked just when he opened his book to continue where he started. The boy shook his head and turned back to read his book. “Matty, did something happen at school?” Matthew sighed exasperatedly but didn’t turn around.

“No.”

“Okay.” Harry said quietly and drew a funny hat for the snowman, “if you want to talk to me about something, I’ll be in the living room.” Harry kissed Amy’s forehead and left her to finish their snowman while he put up their Christmas decorations in all the rooms downstairs. He started with the living room because it’s his favourite and he furnished it himself. He was halfway through the box and put one of the first mistletoes above the door when they opened and shy brown eyes looked up at him.

“Dad?” Matty called and the nervousness in his voice pulled Harry right to him. His kids should always be happy, smiley and happy, never scared or nervous.

“Yes, pumpkin?”

Matty scrunched up his nose at the nickname but entered the room fully and closed it firmly behind him. “You’d tell me the truth, right?”

Harry nodded and motioned for him to sit on the couch. He outstretched his legs with the length of the couch and Matty snuggled between him and the backrest, putting his head under Harry’s armpit. Harry anticipated a hard conversation coming; he already knew something was bothering his baby boy because he would never lash out on him and his sister without reason. He also knew Matty had to come to him by himself. Like he always did. Because Matty was extremely shy and reserved and Harry had to learn on his own not to push him into anything, but wait until Matty makes up his own mind.

“Am I a loser?” Matty asked so quietly that Harry almost missed it. He pulled him closer to his body, trying to protect him from the dark thoughts that hid underneath his brown hair.

“No. Why would you ask that? Did someone say that to you?” Harry tried to calm his voice and not ask for names and addresses immediately.

Matty poked his head from under Harry’s arm. His brown eyes were sparkling against the light coming from the windows and Harry kissed his forehead. “You’re not a loser, sunshine. You’re brilliant. And smart. And such a good boy.”

“Some boys in my class told me that.” Matty croaked, his voice breaking on the last word and Harry felt warm drops soaking his jumper.

“Don’t cry, Matty. It’s okay. Who told you that?” Harry asked calmly again but he was boiling inside. He will demand from Mrs Hood names and addresses so he could yell at those boys personally. Maybe not directly yell at them, Harry could never yell at an eight year old, but have a stern conversation with their parents. Matty snuffled and wiped his nose on his sleeve.

“We-we were reading in English class and Mrs Hood showed us some winter themed poems, it’s stupid, and I really liked one of them and I asked her if she could show me some more…” Matty mumbled and stuttered into Harry’s jumper and Harry caressed his hair gently, holding him as close as he can. _Please don’t cry baby you’ll make me cry too_ , Harry thought as his own eyes were filling with tears.

“And she did. She showed me a web page with the writer’s poems and…at the break…few of the boys came to my desk and started to call me names. They said that only losers read poems and that boys play football.”

“What did you say to them?” Harry asked and wiped Matty’s cheeks with his own sleeve.

“Nothing. I said that it doesn’t matter if I like to play football or not. I said that one of my dads is also awful at football and he’s the coolest person in the world.” If Harry didn’t start to cry so far, this was the moment he was bawling like a little baby.

“Oh, Matty. I love you so much. You showed them, pumpkin. You really did.”

“Dad? Why are you crying?” Matty inquired and squeezed out of Harry’s embrace.

“You were crying too. Joined crying, sunshine. I hate seeing you sad.” Harry explained and wiped at his wet cheeks. Matty chuckled and helped him dry his eyes.

“I’m not sad. Not anymore. I realised that people are different, like they say in those cartoons Amy watches and in the books I read, and they like what they like. And there are always idiots who want everything to be how they think it’s best.” Matty said and cuddled back into Harry’s chest.

“You’re so smart. See, not any loser would think like that.” Harry praised his son and kissed him all over his rounded face.

“Dad! Stop! Eww!” Matty pushed away Harry’s face but kissed his cheek nonetheless.

“How did you get so smart? God knows your dads are clueless fools. Who did you get it from?”

Matty shrugged. “Can I show you the poem?” Harry nodded and Matty jumped out from the couch and disappeared behind the doors. Harry wiped the rest of the wet remains on his face and took deep breaths to suppress the redness he was sure was blotching all over his face. He heard tiny feet padding and doors opening.

“Daddy?” Amelia’s silvery voice called and he turned around with his arms outstretched. She smiled toothily, and ran towards him, carrying her drawing. She stood back and pulled the paper up so he could see better. She stared at him as he watched a silly snowman with yellow buttons and a red tomato nose (“Why doesn’t he have a carrot for a nose?” “Because Daddy hates them.”) smile crookedly at him. Amelia waited for his approval of her masterpiece and he took it from her.

“This is going right on the corkboard in your room. So you can see it every time Daddy Lou comes to tell you a bed time story.”

“Will he come tonight? He has to see Frosty.” Amelia said and Harry’s heart sunk. Louis already told him he’ll be coming home late every day this week so he had to step into the usual routine of tucking their daughter in bed with mandatory story. It’s not that Harry hates to do that, he loves his daughter for God’s sake; it’s that she and Louis have a very special bond and he doesn’t want to intrude their routine and special time together. “Please, daddy. Make him come.”

Harry put the drawing on the coffee table and pulled his baby girl in a hug. “I can’t, Boo. Daddy Lou has to work. You’ll see him when he comes home.”

“But he always comes when I have to be in bed. And…I stay up all night and wait for him. But when he comes he locks himself in your room. He never wants to play with me anymore.”

Then Matty came back carrying a paper and looked at the pout on Amelia’s face and Harry’s apologetic eyes.

“It’s about dad again, huh?” Matty asked but looked at Amelia who crossed her arms on her chest and puffs air out her mouth.

“Why do you care? I’m just a little baby you don’t want to play with.” Amelia said and Matty crouched next to her, offering a small chocolate cookie.

“If I give you this cookie, will you forgive me?” Matty asked with a small smile on his face, trying to break through his sister’s ‘thick’ barriers.

“I want two.”

Matty sighed, like her bargain was rivalling that of professional hijackers but he pulled another one from his back pocket and waved with them in front of her face. She smiled widely and stuffed both cookies in her mouth.

“Fank yoo!” she said and leaned back on the coffee table, pleased. _My children_ , Harry thought in wonder, _my beautiful, wonderful children_.

Matty then turned to his dad and showed him the paper he was carrying. Harry skimmed over the verses briefly.

 

**Long into the night, into the white winter night**

_Long into the night, into the deaf winter night_

_My mother weaves white linen_

_Her bent figure and her graying hair_

_Poured tears all over her a long time ago_

_A lamp light from the window covers the yard_

_Over the falling snow outside_

_In silence without end, in silence without end_

_Angels from heaven with gentle hands,_

_Lower freezing stars down to Earth_

_Taking care not to awake my darling._

_Long into the night, into the bleak winter night_

_My mother weaves white linen_

_Oh, my sad mother! Say what is shining_

_In your eyes_

_Long into the night, into the white winter night?_

“It’s so sad, Matty. I mean… Beautiful but sad.” Harry murmured and looked at the pleased smile on his son’s face.

“I like it.” Matty said and Harry smiled at him.

 

Predictably, Louis came home late that night. Harry was finishing decorating the hallway upstairs and yawned so hard he finally dropped the box with decorations and decided to continue the next day. He heard a car pull over in front of their house and steadily drive into their garage. Amelia was long asleep in her bed after Harry read her Cinderella twice that night failing with the funny voices the first time. He made sure she was actually sleeping and not waiting for her dad to come home. Louis trudged on the staircase to their bedroom and greeted Harry with a peck on the lips. He silently retreated into their bedroom and flopped on the bed.

“Long day?” Harry asked and took off his clothes, and then folded them on the chair next to their chest of drawers. Louis mumbled incoherently and Harry put on a loose pyjama pants. Without waiting for Louis to repeat his answer in a more coherent matter, Harry slipped into their en suite and washed his teeth. When he came back into the room feeling tired and ready to sleep, he saw Louis bundled into their blankets and duvet with only his eyes blinking tiredly at Harry.

“How was your day?” Louis asked, question muffled by the covers. Harry joined him under the covers and snuggled close, pulling Louis beside him. He breathed deeply and felt his heart calming with every brush of Louis fingers on his chest.

“It was okay. Started to decorate the house. Baked some cookies. Kids were good. Mostly. Amelia asked when you are going to read to her.” Harry answered and Louis stiffened next to him.

“What did you say to her? Shit, she isn’t mad at me too much?”

Harry shook his head. “No. She just wants to play with her Daddy Lou.” Louis chuckled and hid in the crook of Harry’s neck (which steadily became every family member’s favourite place to snuggle in, Harry noticed).

“What about Matty? What is he up to?” Louis asked and Harry hesitated to answer. Louis just got home and he didn’t want to worry him too much and steal the precious hours of sleep he needs.

“Matty…is okay.” Harry said and Louis’ hands stilled on his chest.

“What happened with Matty?”

“Louis…”

“Did he do something? Was someone rude to him?” Louis inquired further, looking at Harry to trace everything Harry wanted to hide from him.

“Some boys picked on him. Called him names and… but he’s fine. Really, Louis. Our boy is such a smart kid.”

“Which boys? Do we need to talk to their parents? What if they start to bully him, Haz? What-”

“It’s okay, Lou.” Harry interrupted his wave of questions full of concern for the welfare of their firstborn. “He dealt with it pretty good. We cried a bit, but he told me that he doesn’t worry about them and that they’re close-minded idiots and…that he thinks I’m the coolest dad in the world.” Harry’s heart fluttered at his admission and he blushed when Louis’ impressed eyes gazed at him.

“That’s what _I_ keep telling you, Haz. You’re such a bloody good parent. That kid will win at life if you keep this up.” Louis said and kissed Harry’s cheek. Harry blushed at the praise.

“He’ll do that all on his own. He’s a smart kid.”

“Just like his dad.” Louis added and Harry kissed him on the lips. Louis nudged their noses together. “I love you.”

“I love you too.” Harry replied.

~

Week before Christmas, snow covered every bit of land it could reach. Branches of the trees were sagging heavily under the white weight, sidewalks were barely passable and cars couldn’t be moved out of the garages without some kind of difficulty. Everything was glistening with whiteness and Harry loved it. Although preferring summer over winter, he found a certain beauty in these cold and cloudy days. Nights weren’t as dark (what from the lamp posts casting light and what from the white blanket they were surrounded by), he had more excuses to snuggle with Louis by the fireplace, his children came home exceptionally merry and pink-cheeked after few hours of snowball fighting or sledding down the hill Louis used as a kid and Harry’s favourite holiday was in winter. There was a certain magic about Christmas, no matter where he was during the holiday; beach in California, Holmes Chapel, New York… The feeling was the same everywhere. The content warmth and giddiness encompassed every cell in his body and the smell of home made cookies only intensified it. And Harry baked. Almost every day. Louis complained about not fitting into his pants anymore but Harry also noticed the happy smiles on his face every time Harry brought a new batch on the table.

First he had to clear the driveway of snow. It was funny seeing Louis struggle with getting out on the road but after he was late to pick up Amelia and Matthew on their last day of school before the break – it was definitely time to do something about it.

He took a large snow shovel they keep in a garden shed and started to clear their driveway.

“Daaaad! Why are you doing that?” Matty complained when he came outside, fit into his large jacket and snow pants along with boots, ready to make snow angels in their garden. “Don’t do that!”

Harry grunted under the weight he was carrying and then tossed all of it to the side, turning towards his son. “Why? Matty, we can’t move the cars out on the street anymore.”

Matty pouted. “But everything won’t be white then! We’ll have a white garden, white roof and white fence but driveway will be a stupid grey mess. It will ruin everything.”

Harry sighed and picked up some more snow. “Matty. Just go play. Please. There’s enough snow in the garden to fill your entire day.”

Matty didn’t say anything but stomped in protest and flicked some of the snow on the spot Harry just cleared. Harry patted the spot and levelled the small bit to the ground.  He saw Matty disappear in the back garden.

He turned to the task at hand and was already halfway done when it started to snow again. “Oh shit.” Harry groaned and looked pleadingly at the sky with his arms stretched. _I just started clearing the driveway, could you wait another hour?_ he thought as he picked up the shovel and continued to work. _It will probably be over in seconds_ , he assured himself when he scraped along the fence that blocked the way to the garden. His gloved fingers were gripping the shaft and the handle and he worried about blisters.

“Hmm.” He hummed when a tiny snowflake caught his attention. It fell gently on his thumb when he tried to fix his cap and push it down his forehead, it looked so pretty. With intricate details, geometrical shapes in the middle and with short ends sticking out.

“Aren’t all snowflakes supposed to be unique?” Harry questioned. The tiny thing melted from the heat of his hand and Harry scratched his chin. _Did anyone ever write a song about people and snowflakes?_ he asked himself, _surely there were songs about winter and snowflakes but did anyone compare snowflakes to a specific person?_ He couldn’t think of a single song. _Maybe I could write one_.

He was juggling with lyrics in his head and hummed possible melodies when a car pulled over in their driveway. When the car door slammed he saw Louis’ face light up with a smile and quickly absorbing the cold in his cheeks. Harry mirrored the expression on his face. Louis strolled to his husband and wrapped his fingers around Harry’s scarf.

“Hello, snowflake.” Harry said after a hello kiss. “What are you doing at home this early?”

Louis rolled his eyes. “What, no _how are you Louis, have you travelled home safe Louis, how was work Louis_?” he said, imitating Harry’s deep voice and chuckled. He kissed Harry’s cheek before answering: “I’m on a holiday. I requested some time off for the holidays and-” he rubbed his thumb over his forehead, “I’ll be at home until Boxing Day. Then I’m going back.”

Harry’s face almost split in delight. “You got time off?”

Louis nodded leaned against Harry’s tall frame. “I missed you and the kids. And what happened with Amelia really shook me. Also, they were fucking annoying, wanting me to set everything up for the club’s academy for kids so I told them I’ll deal with it after Christmas.”

“Academy for kids?” Harry asked and squeezed Louis tighter in his hold.

“Yeah. Didn’t I tell you? Jesus, I was so busy that…I’m sorry. But yeah. I thought of the academy for kids aged 12 to 16, something like a prep-camp for kids who want to be better at football and easy deal for the club to spot new talents at such a young age. You know, like Barcelona and thousands of other clubs have but we’re _sostupidandonlythoughtofitnow_ …”

“Louis, breathe.” Harry said and kissed his forehead, “I understand. And it’s a brilliant idea, Lou. I’m so proud of you. But now you’re gonna be with us now so don’t stress over anything.” He hugged him some more and then Louis (half-frozen and severely pink-cheeked) rushed into the house, carrying his suitcase which was light as a feather – which made Harry bite on his bottom lip to suppress a smile.

Predictably, the kids were thrilled over the news that Louis will stay at home for a week – Amelia attached herself to his neck and didn’t let go for a long time – and they spent the rest of the day playing in the snow to make up for the lost time with their dad.

Louis whispered into Amelia’s ear that night when he tucked her into her bed that they will go ice-skating the next day. And for the first time in over a week and a half, Harry snuggled next to his husband without anxiously checking the clock until midnight.

After almost a week and a half he finally made love to him properly, with no rush or worry that Louis won’t get enough hours of sleep.

And after almost a week and a half, Harry fell asleep with a smile on his face when Louis nuzzled into the back of his head and pulled him closer to his chest.

~

“Harry, just keep your knees together!” Louis yelled from across the ice-skating rink. “Come on! Now one foot in front of the other! Like you’re trying to walk!”

“Come on, dad!” Matty joined in encouraging yells at his struggling father. Harry looked over at tiny, bundled up Amy who was spinning in circles near Louis like she was born on the ice. He sighed over his fortune for being born with too long legs and narrow hips which completely messed up with his centre of balance on slippery ice.

But Harry is no quitter. He needs to be an example for his children, and also prove Louis wrong (that smirking bastard), so he will push himself off the fence and slide over to his family. Elegantly. Or at least try to.

He took a deep breath and loosened his grip of the fence.

“Yessss!” Matty screamed and threw his arms in the air. “Go, dad!” Harry smiled at his son’s antics and drifted over the ice. He was happy for his progress, no sudden falls and loses of balance and he outstretched his hands forward to catch Louis’ and Matty’s hands.

“Daddy!” Amelia said when she noticed Harry sliding over to them. In few quick slides she was in front of him and hugged him around his waist suddenly, kicking his ice skates and Harry felt again that familiar feeling of falling over. He held tight onto Amelia and aimed on falling on his back, trying to soften her own fall. When his back connected to the cold ice, he was kicked out of breath but he didn’t release his hold on Amelia, who was lying on top of him with concerned wide eyes.

“Daddy, I’m so sorry. Are you okay?”

Harry huffed with difficulty and heard a pair of ice skates coming to them. “Harry, love, are you okay? Amelia, did you hurt yourself?” Louis’ clear voice was heard before he dropped on his knees next to them. He pulled Amelia off Harry and checked her for injuries. Matty helped Harry catch his breath and stand on his feet.

“Are you okay, love?” Louis asked Harry when he made sure Amelia was okay. Harry nodded but gripped Louis’ hand.

“Let’s- let’s go home. I’m not made for the ice.” Harry complained, embarrassed over the entire event. He will need lots of kisses and hugs from his family to make the bruises on his ego fade.

Louis took his hand and squeezed. “You’re still like a baby deer on ice, sweetcheeks. Come, we’ll melt you in front of the fireplace with some hot chocolate. What do you say?” Harry smiled at him and pulled him in for a sweet kiss.

“Ew.” Matty commented on their display of affection while Amy giggled, tugging Louis’ other hand.

 

An hour later, their little family was huddled in their living room in front of the fireplace, sipping hot chocolate in each of their mugs. Louis and Harry were pressed together on the couch, woollen blanket over their shoulders and Amelia was kneeling in front of the coffee table drawing their family outing. Matthew leaned on the far end of the couch, reading _The Nutcracker and the Mouse King_.

“Daddy,” Amelia said after she finished her drawing, “do you think Ms Wheatly will like my drawing?” She pulled the drawing up and almost pushed it in their faces. Louis took it from her and stretched it between them. There were four people drawn in typical kiddy style, with big blobs for heads, colourful clothes and sticks for limbs. One figure was in the centre, with blue eyes and light brown hair – biggest than all the others - and around him were two smaller figures. One had Matty’s brown eyes and dark brown hair and the other had Amelia’s long curly hair and blue eyes. Figure that was obviously supposed to be Harry was sitting on the floor next to them, long legs sticking each way.

“I like it. Who’s this chap on the floor?” he sniggered and glanced at Harry. Harry grunted and sneaked his hand under Louis’ arm to tickle his side. Louis squealed and gently pushed Harry’s palm away.

“I think you perfectly captured your dad’s mess of hair, Little Boo.” Louis commented as if he were evaluating a highly priced masterpiece.

“Why did you put me on the floor, Amy?” Harry said, pointing to himself on the drawing.

“Because you can’t ice skate very well, daddy.” Amy simply said, “but that’s okay. I can never draw a horse as pretty as Margaret McGee but I’m not sad about it. I draw better flowers than her. And you know how to make best cookies in the world, daddy. Daddy Lou can’t even cook.”

Louis giggled at her observation. “I think I’ll draw a snowman here too. It isn’t winter without a snowman.”

Harry and Louis leaned back on the couch and Louis entwined their fingers together while they sat in silence, watching their children do what they love. Harry absentmindedly thought that if he were to die right this second, if an ill-timed heart attack struck him now he would go happy. He squeezed Louis’ hand and wrapped the other arm around Matty’s shoulders, careful not to jostle him and break the connection the boy had with the world of Nutcracker.

Amelia started to babble about what her other friends are up to during their winter holidays. Matty looked up at Harry and closed his book. He put it aside and snuggled closer to Harry. Because at the fragile age of only eight, Matty is still a little boy who needs affection from his dad. Harry wondered when will that stop. When will Matty start thinking kisses and hugs from his dad aren’t cool anymore and that he’s annoying instead of the best. He hoped it will never come.

But for now he will pull his son closer to his chest and kiss the top of his head, because he can.

“Hey, I want cuddles too!” Amelia protested and flung her tiny body in Louis’ lap, quickly wrapping her arms around his neck. Louis peppered her face with kisses and she giggled.

Harry was wrong. If he were to die at this moment, he would die happiest on Earth.

 

After dinner that night, Louis set everything up in their entertainment room (which consisted of a football table, big LCD screen, leather sofa big enough for five people and Louis’ old Spiderman statue) for family movie night. He dug out some cliché Christmas movies along with animated movies for the kids, made Harry to make big bowl of popcorn and cookies and collected all the pillows they have in the house for the biggest pillow nest in front of a flat screen any person could think of having. Harry made all of the family members to wear Christmas jumpers they got from grandmas and provided extra blankets and chocolate milk.

Love Actually was followed by Rise of the Guardians which was followed by Jack Frost and Frozen. Amelia insisted they watch Elf too. But it was past midnight when they were half-through Frozen and Harry opposed the idea firmly. Louis was on the verge of obliging but Harry insisted.

“Just because you don’t have school until January doesn’t mean you can stay past your bedtime.” He said and Amelia pouted. She turned to Louis and brought out the puppy eyes. Harry could see Louis’ firm fatherly spirit was crumbling by each second and he took Amelia with him and tuck her in bed after she brushed her teeth.

“You’re no fun.” She complained when she put her lilac duvet over her head.

“Amy, baby. Please. Give your daddy a kiss, will you? I can’t go to bed without a kiss.” Harry said and poked the swell under the duvet.

“No! You’re mean.”

“I’m your dad. You’re still a little girl, I have to look after you.”

“I’m not! I go to school! I’m a big girl!”

Harry chuckled. “Mhmm. Sorry. I’m old so I forget. Will that big girl kiss me now?”

“No.”

“Well, then I have no choice.” Harry said standing up, “I have to kidnap Daddy Lou and you’ll never see him again. Also Jessie the Bunny.”

“NOooo!” Amelia yelled and pulled duvet off, scrambling out of her bed, “don’t take them! I’ll kiss you!” she grabbed at Harry’s sleeve and he crouched down. She planted a small kiss on his cheek and he hugged her quickly.

“Will you be nice? You’re not mad at your dad anymore?” Harry asked and she shook her head.

“No. But only if you make me more cookies.”

“I’m running out of ingredients for cookies.” Harry snorted, “and you have to start eating veggies and fruits, young lady. All that sugar will eat your teeth. You’ll be like an old grandma, missing all of them.”

“But I brush them every night! And morning. Sometimes.” Amelia said and burrowed herself back into her bed.

“Ok. Goodnight, precious.” Harry said and kissed her forehead before switching off the main light and keeping a small lamp lit on far end of the room. “I love you.” He added before closing the door.

“I love you too.” Amelia mumbled and closed her eyes.

Louis was waiting in the hallway and when Harry closed the door, he rushed towards them. “I’ll be just…one second. I started cleaning downstairs…I’ll just-”he said and sneaked into Amelia’s room. Probably going to give a goodnight kiss to her. While Harry put back numerous pillows, he couldn’t help thinking how little is left until Christmas. Still six or so days, but it’ll go in a blink of an eye and then they all would go their separate ways; kids to school, Louis and him to work. It’ll be back to pre-holiday routine. Harry wanted to keep this lovely bubble they’ve created and prolong it, well, at least until spring holidays.

“Haz?” he heard Louis’ tired voice and turned around. Louis was leaned seductively against the side, one hip protruding to the side and legs crossing at the ankles. Harry blinked several times and forced the blush from his cheeks to cool down. He loved when Louis blatantly checked him out and he looked rather snugly in his oversized Christmas jumper with reindeers on them.

“Look up.” Louis said and Harry tilted his head curiously before looking at the ceiling. Louis laughed and Harry looked back at him to see what was so funny. Was it another elaborate game of made you look? But then he saw it. The tiny green plant with glistening leaves and white berries was hanging from the top of the door.

“Oh.” Harry blushed even more. Like a little boy caught by a prospect of kissing his long-time crush. Louis smirked and invited him closer wiggling a crooked finger. Harry beamed and skipped towards him, pulled by an invisible rope. He put his hands on Louis’ hips and nudged his cheek with his nose.

“Oh, just kiss me, you idiot.” Louis mumbled and pulled Harry down, connecting their lips together. It was sweet and without much tongue involved – simple brush of lips for several seconds. Then Louis leaned back in when they drew apart, poking much deeper into Harry’s mouth with his tongue and causing Harry’s knees going weak. Louis kissed deeply and passionately that Harry felt blush from his cheek go south. Harry tried to pull back but Louis held him firmly on the back of his neck to explore his mouth a bit more.

“How the fuck…” Louis said between kisses, “could” kiss “you” kiss “be so damn attractive” long kiss “even in your early thirties?” One of Louis’ hands crawled under Harry’s jumper and Harry squealed at its coldness against his skin. “You were fit when you were sixteen, got outrageously hot in your twenties and now - it’s just so damn unfair. Why do you keep getting more and more fit?” Louis seriously pondered this problem (as much as serious the topic was).  
”I could ask you the same thing, Lou.” Harry answered. He laughed and his eyes were reduced to happy slits.

“It’s unfair. Us humans aren’t accustomed to such beauty.”

Harry pursed his lips. “You don’t have to seduce me, Lou. Not anymore.” He smiled cheekily, groping Louis’ bum slightly, “Since you put that ring on my finger, I’m yours. If you want sex, you just need to whistle.”

“Woof.” Louis barked mockingly. He kissed him some more, making Harry’s plump lips scarlet red. “Do you think I could blow you, right here?”

“Lou, the kids…”

“They’re asleep, Hazza. Come on. Just a bit of groping and a quick blowjob?”

“Our room is right upstairs. I don’t want to scar my kids. At least not while they’re still so young and innocent.”

“ _Our_ kids, Curly.” Louis corrected with a tiny glare. “Don’t make me say please.” he whined. He pulled Harry more in by the collar of his jumper. “I’ll let you fuck me on the dining table.” He whispered in his ear and Harry visibly shook at the mere suggestion.

“Lou.” Harry’s voice was deeply hoarse and his jeans barely fit anymore. “Oh god. We eat there. We can’t do this like when we were engaged. We –uhm - need to be responsible.” Louis loosened his grip on the collar of Harry’s jumper and palmed the growing bulge in Harry’s jeans. Harry panted at Louis’ cheeks and sucked in a deep breath.

“Lou.”

“Fuck me.” Louis said and withdrew his hand, ducking under Harry’s arm and ran upstairs. It took Harry almost half a minute to catch up with what happened. When his mind cleared a bit, he ran after Louis and double checked if he locked the door to their bedroom.

~

All members of Tomlinson-Styles household went for a last minute shopping four days before Christmas. Harry thought it won’t be necessary, but Louis still didn’t buy presents for the kids (“I couldn’t decide what to give them, and you were hopping around playing Jamie Oliver on crack with your bloody cookies so you were of no use!”) and he was out of vegetables for Christmas dinner. Another thing Harry had to take care of was planning Louis’ birthday. Which was getting trickier and trickier every year.

As Louis grew older (“He wasn’t even _that_ old!” Harry thought), he tried to put all the focus off him on this day and put the kid’s holiday cheer first. He joked about getting older and “what’s the point of celebrating your birthday nowadays anyway” remarks were more frequent. But Harry knew that Louis relished everything he gave him. Even if it was a home-cooked in their house while Liam or Zayn babysit their kids.

Yet, something was different this year. Not Louis, he still complained every time Harry brought up something about a ‘certain birthday’ or ‘celebration’, it was more of the mood and atmosphere of the upcoming date. Perhaps it had something to do with Louis’ yesterday discovery: “HARRY!!! It started!!! I’m greying!!! I’m losing my hair!” It was a tiny, fragile grey hair on the side of his head but it could’ve been the size of an elephant when Louis panicked over it.

“It’s over. I’m done. All the bright days of my youth are now to be replaced by stretchy pants and telling war stories while chugging stale beer with Viagra tablets. Now I only live for my children!” Louis moaned and whined while Harry had rolled his eyes and tried to pluck out the unwanted string.

“DON’T YOU DARE STYLES! THREE MORE WILL GROW!”

Yes. It is going to be a _fun time_ planning the fancy dinner for his husband. If push comes to shove, he’ll just bribe him with sexual offers. He just might make sexy coupons too.

Anyway, all four of them were wandering through _Frenchgate shopping centre_ in Doncaster, blending in the crowd who were also very late with their Christmas shopping.

Amelia was jumping excitedly and looking around at the people and the shops while holding onto Harry’s hand. Matty and Louis were in deep discussion why Spiderman is better than Superman (or rather why _any_ superhero is better than Superman). Harry looked at his shopping list. There wasn’t much stuff they still had to buy. Potatoes and parsley, check. Ginger and soy sauce, check. He will have to get an extra bottle of wine for the chicken. Or check his cookbook again and drop by an open Tesco in the neighbourhood. He’ll probably need extra bottles for Louis’ birthday…not to mention candles and serviettes.

Sainsbury’s it is then.

The family walks around bright isles of the only supermarket in _Frenchgate_ , Harry picking from the shelves all the remaining things on his list and putting them in his shopping cart, and Louis and the kids being extremely unhelpful and picking random things from shelves and cluttering Harry’s cart. After Harry reprimanded them and glared at Louis, it didn’t really change anything. Louis still encouraged Matty and Amelia to drop sweets in, but only every few minutes when Harry turned his back and didn’t look at them.

Harry gave up and let them take a big bag of holiday sweets, and sent Louis to look for Yorkshire pudding.

He walked with his children in the isle with kitchen accessories and liquid washing-ups when a timid voice called out: “Hello.”

Harry looked up from the ‘all-purpose cloths’ and sponges that were neatly aligned on the shelves and saw a young girl. By the looks of it, she was probably in her late or mid twenties, bundled up nicely in dark red coat and fluffy beanie on her head. She was smiling widely at Harry and looked down at Matty and Amy who were looking back at her with confusion.

“Hi.” She said again and Harry greeted back. “Uhm…I’m terribly sorry to bother you, but…uhm…are you Harry Styles?”

Oh. So it was that. She’s a fan. Or was a fan. Harry was quite amused by her nervous approach, and tried to assure her with big smile that he won’t harm her and that he’s not scary retired musician at all.

“Yeah, I am. It’s Tomlinson-Styles now, though.” He said and the girl’s smile widened even more, cheeks blushing pleasantly. Matty and Amelia stuck close to him when he stepped towards the girl to give her a hug. Everybody deserved a hug in Harry’s opinion. Especially shy strangers who found the courage to speak to a former boybander. 

“What’s your name?” he asked her and patted Amy’s head when she pulled the sleeve of his coat.

“Sarah.” The girl answered, “I’ve been a big fan of your band since I was fifteen. I just… I can’t believe I met you in Sainsbury’s of all places.”

Harry laughed. “Just some last minute shopping with the family.” He said as if he’s talking with an old friend instead of a stranger he met only three minutes ago. Sarah looked down at Matty and Amelia who grew increasingly bored of the encounter and conversation.

“Oh, of course. Hi.” She waved at them and they half-heartedly answered.

“Come on. Be nice to Sarah.” Harry said but they only walked away to look at opened tough scourers. “Sorry…”

“What are their names?” Sarah inquired and Harry lit up. He loved talking about Matty and Amelia to people.

“The boy is Matty and the little girl is Amelia. They’re brilliant. Amelia is usually friendly and very chatty but I think she’s a bit tired now. She’s six and she’s in her first year at school. She likes to draw a lot. The entire house is filled with her drawings.”

Sarah smiled at Harry’s babbling. “And Matty…well he’s a little shy and reserved. He reads a lot and he likes comic books too. He’s a typical eight year old apart from that. Louis bought him dozens of video games and they play together sometimes.”

“So, a bit like mini Zayn?” Sarah suggested after Harry’s brief description of Matty’s personality. Harry tapped his lips in thought. He never thought about that.

“Well…there are similarities. I guess… but Matty is his own person. He hates football. Louis can’t ever get him to play and he doesn’t like to draw very much. He’s been very interested in poetry lately.”

“Dad!” Matty grumbled from behind. Harry proudly turned around and smiled.

“You are!”

Matty scowled, cheeks pink from embarrassment and turned back to poke at the scrounger some more. Harry turned back to Sarah and winked at her.

“UHm…Sorry, I’ve been talking your ear off about my kids… Did you want an autograph or a picture?” he asked, embarrassed about his over-share of his private life. It’s been nearly six years since One Direction stopped touring and Harry encountered fans or their mothers less and less over the years. Sometimes it seemed like people have forgotten about them but it always pricks at Harry’s heart happily when he sees that people haven’t stopped listening to their music. That even after all these years something he contributed in and wrote still matters, no matter how small. He tries to still be as welcoming as he’s ever been but he fears how Amelia and Matty take all the encounters with strangers (if they’re accidentally with him in public and people come to him) and if they’re uncomfortable with it.

Louis and he had a small talk with Matty and he assured them it was fine, that it’s almost the same when his friend’s parents stop and chat with their old friends. Which Harry supposes is true at some extent. But then Louis and Harry have thousands of ‘old friends’.

Sarah took out her phone and stood next to Harry. She extended it in front of their faces and a artificial shutter snapped several times.

“Thank you. Thank you so much.” She said and hugged Harry more boldly. Harry chuckled and patted her back. She pulled away and reluctantly walked down the isle, waving awkwardly and then walking in the other direction, deeper into the store.

Almost five minutes later, after he checked his list for the last time and made sure he had everything, he noticed that not only Louis still didn’t come back but that Amelia wasn’t at his side. He turned to Matty who was idly strolling behind him and touched boxes of colourful cereal.

“Matty, where’s your sister?” he asked and panic started to swell up in his lungs when he saw Matty’s nonchalant shrug.

“I don’t know.” He added, making Harry’s stomach clench, “I think she went to the toy section. She said something about a unicorn. Maybe she’s with dad.”

“Why didn’t you keep an eye on her? Oh god.” Harry said, raising his voice slightly and feeling guilty for that. He already imagined Amy walking away, holding hands with a faceless stranger or buried in the ball pit and gasping for air. Maybe even eating something in the store and one of the staff taking her in for shoplifting. His little girl! How could he be so careless and leave her unattended! Where even was _Louis_ for heaven’s sake?! Harry’s heart was squeezing in his chest and he needed to find Amelia now.

“Matty…uhm… I’m sorry, but we have to…We have to find your sister. Come.” Harry’s voice trembled with fear and adrenaline. Matty noticed how nervous his dad was and sensed this was a very serious situation.

They ran through the store, checking in every isle and corner, especially in the toy section, calling discreetly for Amelia. Harry kept mumbling about having to find Amelia and apologising to Matty for yelling at him and Matty grabbed his hand, squeezing it hard.

“Dad, it’s alright. We’ll find her.”

Harry stopped in his tracks when he realised something.

They haven’t told Louis. Or found Louis in the entire store in the first place. Which was…a bit strange.

“Louis… I need to call your dad.” He said to Matty and gestured to him to start looking around the tills and the queues while he makes a phone call. Harry typed in quickly Louis’ number and after only messing up twice, pressed the device to his ear, praying silently that Louis picks up his phone. After three excruciating rings during which Harry’s eyes welled with frustrated tears, Louis’ breathy voice called from the other line.

“Yeah, Haz?”

“Lou.” Harry croaked, few tears slipping down his cheeks, “I…wh-where are you?”

“Harry. What- did something happen?” Louis asked, alarmed by Harry’s broken voice and sniffles.

“I…I think I lost Amelia.” Harry breathed out the answer, worry eating up all the strength of his voice.

“WHAT?!” Louis shouted and Harry moved the phone away from his ear, “HOW DID THAT HAPPEN? ARE YOU SERIOUS? I’M COMING TO YOU! DON’T MOVE!” Harry hung up without a goodbye and looked pleadingly at Matty who sadly sighed and said he didn’t see Amelia anywhere. Harry worried his bottom lip and squeezed Matty close to him, not intent on losing him too. He couldn’t stay here and wait for Louis to come from wherever he was. He needed to find his daughter before something bad happened. He couldn’t believe he became one of those cliché parents who loose their kids in stores. Matty’s encouraging words from few days ago suddenly turned sour and dull in his ears.

He was an awful parent.

He tugged Matty’s arm and pulled him out of the store, the sensors beeping after them in warning for going the wrong way.

“Are you sure she said toys?” Harry asked Matty over his shoulder, hurrying down the wide halls and moving around people. He remembered vaguely a toy store they passed on their way to Sainsbury’s and he wondered if he will find Amy there. Matty was hanging on his arm really tight and following his steps as quickly as he could on his small and short legs. Harry couldn’t stop shaking.

“Over there!” Matty suddenly yelled and jerked Harry in the other way. Harry scanned over the place Matty was dragging him towards when he noticed a little girl with familiar dark brown hair…

“Amelia! Amelia!” Harry screamed over the heads of the crowd and rushed to his daughter. She was innocently watching the display of antique dolls in the window shop and looked up when she heard Harry’s voice calling her.

“Hey, daddy! Look at these dolls!” she cheerfully said and Harry dropped to his knees in front of her, scooping her in his arms and squeezing tight. He breathed in her smell, the fruity shampoo he bought for her and the tender washing powder. Oh, thank God and heavens above! Harry was still coming down from the high of his fear and rush of adrenaline as he held her in his arms.

“Amy. I love you so much. Don’t ever walk away like that again, alright?” Harry mumbled into her hair, pressing kisses.

“Yeah, Ames. You gave us all a good scare.” Matty added and put a hand on his sister’s back.

“But I’m fine. I’m not hurt.” Amy said, pushing Harry from her to look at his face. “Daddy, don’t cry. I’m fine. I was just looking at pretty dolls.” She wiped at Harry’s face, eyes blinking in worry.

“I’m fine.” Harry said and kissed her cheek, “I was just worried, Little Boo.” He felt his heart pumping slower, cooling his veins and calming his soul. He could breathe again. A booming smile was etched on his face when he looked at his children and he pulled them in again, in a bone-crushing hug.

“Let’s…huh…let’s go find Daddy Lou.”

In that exact moment, they heard shouting and commotion on the other end of the hall. Someone was pushing people out of the way and ran through. They were also yelling desperately and apologising half-heartedly while frantically looking in every direction.

“Amelia! Amelia! Harry! Matty!”

“Louis!” Harry said, noticing that the frantic person was his husband. When Louis turned, his eyes widened and relief flooded his face.

“There you are! You found her!” he said and skipped towards them, hugging Amelia and Matty.

“Ugh. Dad, I’m not the one who was lost.” Matty complained but didn’t let go. Amelia frowned at him.

“I didn’t get lost. I knew exactly where I was.” She said and Louis laughed shakily. He pressed kisses to each of their cheeks. While Matty scrunched up his nose, Amelia kissed Louis’ cheek in return. Louis stood up and took their hands.

“Hi, love.” He said and beamed at Harry who was looking at them the entire time with a private smile.

“Lou. Where were you? Did you get lost, too? Yorkshire puddings were an isle away from where we were…”

Louis tensed for a second, licking his lips nervously. Harry traced the movement suspiciously. “I-I… I was- I got a phone call. Yeah. Ryan called me from the club. I just walked while he explained some things and obviously got to far away. Oops.” He said and started walking towards the exit, not waiting to see if Harry swallowed the story. Harry didn’t, but his mind was still running wild from everything that happened in the last half hour that he decided he will let it go. Whatever Louis did or wherever he was, wasn’t Harry’s concern.

For now. He will thoroughly interrogate him when the holidays pass.

 

In the end he bought everything on his list from the local Tesco and extra sweets for the kids and Louis.

~

“Mum, I was thinking…if we can come on Boxing Day? Uhm… I thought we will stay home with Amy and Matty on Christmas Day ‘cause, well you know how Louis’ job is like… who knows when he’ll have time to come home on time…” Harry babbled into the microphone of the house phone to his mum while he sauntered in the kitchen, placing all the appliances on the counter. He was planning on making one last batch before Christmas Eve tomorrow when he’ll call the catering company. He figured Louis wouldn’t want an extravagant evening but still something that was all about him. He called all their close friends and family members who could come for quiet dinner. He hasn’t seen the lads in few months, as well as Louis’ mum and sisters (not to mention little Ernest and Jack who were growing like sprouts, much like Matty and Amelia) and this was the perfect opportunity to hit two birds with one stone.

“Mhmm…” Anne mumbled from the other end of the line, “sure, darling. I can’t wait to see my grandkids. Will you mind if I spoil them too much while you’re with us?” she laughed, imagining Harry’s disapproving expression. As if on cue, Harry puffed and smiled into the phone.

“But not too much. Ever since the holidays started I’m having real trouble with getting Amelia to eat her veggies, mum. Louis is already making it difficult for me, I don’t need you too.”

“Oh, troubles with the spouse?” Anne giggled, “For all he’s pretending to be tough and strong sometimes, he’s such a big softie, huh?” Harry laughed. _That_ was very true. Louis was the good parent out of two of them; the fun one who lets them eat chocolate before dinner and gives them an extra hour of TV time because they said please. He was smitten with their children, unable to deny them anything they asked. But also while he was keen on pulling pranks on Harry with them, he was also firmly on Harry’s side whenever it was needed. Harry loved him so so much.

“Jack, take your shoes off when you come from outside!” he heard his mum say, voice muffled because she was pressing her hand on the speaker. Harry snorted.

“Is Jack giving you hard time?” he asked and his mother sighed.

“He’s so lively. Reminds me of you when you were his age. And I’m much older now so I can’t really keep up with him.” Anne said, chuckling softly. Harry heard Jack mumbling something on the other end.

“Say hi to your brother.” He heard shuffling and a soft ‘ohhh’ when his mum gave the phone to Jack.

“Hi, Harry.” Jack greeted warmly and Harry’s heart leaped to his throat. He was so busy lately that he only talked to his little brother several times a month and he knew how much Jack needed him. And Gemma too. But Gemma is a girl and Jack looked up to Harry far more.

He remembered when his mum first told him she’s pregnant. He only turned 21 and was beginning to settle in to being engaged to Louis and their upcoming wedding, thinking of his own future children and life in the band (and after, too). He was absolutely ecstatic. And even that word couldn’t cover the joy he felt for having a sibling. Now he knew how Louis felt all these years with his own mum popping out six of them.

He felt he also had some kind of responsibility. He was older and experienced brother and he had to protect him from everything and everyone that might want to hurt him. With Jack, Harry grew a very protective streak for Matty and Amelia. He also found some of the paternal feelings while taking care of Jack when he was a baby. Louis was there, the wise and well trained, to instruct him with all the delicate things that concerned babies. It didn’t take them long to look in for a surrogate. If Harry felt incredible happiness when his brother was born, seeing Matty blinking up at him with his big brown eyes was the thing that brought it really home.

“Hi, Jack. You alright?” he asked and Jack sighed. He imagined the boy looking at their mother under his fringe and turning away, trying to block her away from listening to their conversation.

“Depends.”

“Oh. On what? Did something happen?”

Jack sighed again. Harry heard him go up the stairs and close the door of his room before he answered: “We have a new girl in our class.”

Harry beamed at his confession. He lived for the day Amelia and Matty will come and talk to him about their crushes. Until then, he will live through his brother. “Really? That’s great! Do you like her? Is she pretty?”

“Harry, you sound just like mum.” Jack mumbled, “Yes. She’s pretty. And really cool. She speaks two languages and she has really long hair. She’s…ugh.”

“What’s her name?”

“Charlotte. She’s from France.”

“Did you ask her to be your girlfriend?”

“No.”

“Why not?” Harry inquired, frustrated at Jack a bit for not taking his chance.

“Because. How do you even ask someone that?” Jack huffed, irritated by Harry’s question.

“Just come up to her and ask. It’s not that big of a deal. She’s probably lonely and wants a friend. You could share your lunch with her, ask about some new movie or ask about her hobbies. Think of something, Jack.”

Jack grunted miserably. “She already has friends. People are always around her, especially girls.”

“Girls aren’t scary. They can be really nice and welcoming if you’re nice to them back.”

“What do you know? You’re married to a man. You’ve probably never even had a date with a girl.”

“I did.” Harry countered proudly, “I even had a girlfriend when I was your age. We just kissed and held hands but… It’s not really that different dating a girl than dating a boy. They’re all people.”

Jack was silent for a while on the other line. Then he smacked with his lips and said: “Yeah. Okay. I see your point. I’ll…I’ll talk to her.”

“Good boy, Jack. If it turns out she doesn’t like you, you can still be friends.”

“Yeah. I guess.” Jack muttered. In that moment Harry’s kitchen door flew open and Louis walked in, carrying a thick winter jacket. Harry smiled at him and gestured at the phone when Louis leaned in to kiss him hello. Louis pressed a kiss to his lips nonetheless and Jack grunted about ‘scaring him’ and ‘get a room’. Harry said goodbye to him quickly and told him to say hi to mum and Robin.

“Who was that?” Louis asked and dipped his finger into a bowl with melted chocolate for Harry’s cookies.

“Mum and Jack. Mum says hi. And…” he said and wrapped his arms around Louis’ neck. “Jack is having girl problems.”

Louis’ eyebrows shoot up and he settled his hands on Harry’s hips. “Really? He’s only nine years old.”

Harry’s brows furrowed. “And? That’s not too young to have a romantic interest.”

Louis shrugged and dipped a finger into Harry’s cookie batter and licked. “I don’t know. I wasn’t interested in girls until I was thirteen at least. But even then I only dated because I thought it was the right thing.”

“I know.” Harry commented sadly and nuzzling into Louis’ cheek, “all your attraction was wasted before you met me.” He kissed Louis gently on the lips.

Louis laughed against Harry’s lips and nudged him with his nose. “True. Too true.” He sighed and deflated in Harry’s arms. “I suppose Matty will come to the same age and start getting interested in girls.”

“Or boys.” Harry added.

“Yeah.” Louis smiled. “Then we’ll probably have to have ‘the birds and the bees’ talk with him. And Amelia will start getting crushes too and… I’m not ready for that. Can’t they be cute and little forever?”

Harry shook his head and kissed the top of Louis’ nose. “No.”

“Surely there are drugs we can put in their breakfast and stop them from ever growing up?”

“Lou.”

Louis sagged against Harry’s solid frame. “Time is going by so fucking fast.” Harry didn’t say anything to that, just hummed in agreement and played with hair on the nape of Louis’ neck. A thump was heard coming from the kitchen window. Both Louis and Harry leaned back to peer through it. The snow was falling heavily and two dark figures were sitting in already knee-deep snow, grinning widely and forming snowballs with their small hands.

“I’ll go. The kids are waiting for me. We’re making a snowman.” Louis said and moved away from Harry, putting his jacket on. He put his hand on the doorknob, doors leading to the back garden and turned back to Harry.

“Haz, I love you.”

Harry’s heart swelled up at the emotion in Louis’ voice. “I love you too.” He said thickly. Louis’s eyes crinkled from the force of his smile. Then he bit his bottom lip and looked at Harry with sparkling eyes. It took Harry’s breath away. Then he opened the door, letting the frigid air inside before closing it firmly.

Harry turned back to making his cookies, but with a smile on his face. He pressed _play_ on the small radio and filled their kitchen with soft Christmas themed melodies. He worked quickly, pressing and shaping the batter, filling the cookies with finger-licking chocolate. After putting the tray in the oven, he looked out through the window. Snow, thankfully, stopped falling so there wouldn’t be an immediate intervention in the driveway. Harry instead looked at the three figures that played in the snow, chucking snowballs at one another and rolling a big one between them. He laughed when Matty and Amelia piled on top of Louis, knocking him back in the snow and burying deep in it.

In the few days that Louis was home he glowed. Whenever Matty and Amelia were near, he’d smile and his eyes would crinkle in a special way. He’d always make excuses to do something with them, even if it’s just sitting next to them while they’re watching cartoons or Matty’s playing video games. If Harry didn’t know any better, he’d think he’s trying to absorb everything before he kicked the bucket but that can’t be it. _They had prevention medical exams last month and Louis was perfectly healthy_ , Harry thought. Whatever spurred Louis into this kind of behaviour, Harry was glad. Not many parents make the time of the day for their children and they certainly don’t try to make it up to them in a meaningful way.

Louis was just wonderful. Wonderful as a husband, as a father…as anything. Don’t get it wrong, he could be really difficult and proper pain in the unmentionables a lot of times but when it really counts…when it really counts he is – wonderful. And the kids…They’ll grow up. They’re growing up in this very second and there’s nothing he can do. Except be the best parent he can be. So Harry imagined himself stopping the time for a while and bringing home another baby. Going all over again.

But…that’s a thought for another time. Maybe when his mind is not fogged with mulled wine and smell of cookies while he watches the happy faces of his family.

_~_

Christmas morning came early. With sun poking it’s head through the thick clouds and snow glistening under the rays. It was calm and not a sound was heard from anywhere. But they say that everything is quiet right before a storm. Or something.

Amelia came running to the doors of Harry’s and Louis’ bedroom, screaming at the top of her lungs.

“It’s Christmas! It’s Christmas! Presents are here! Father Christmas was here!!!”

Harry and Louis grunted and mumbled in their sleep, blocking her excited yelling. She opened widely their door and scrambled up on their bed, then jumped up and down waking them up.

“Amy. Amy. We’re sleeping.” Louis said and covered his head with his pillow. Amelia flopped on top of him, kicking him in the ribs.

“NO! Daddy, presents! There’s for you, too!” Amelia shrieked and Louis sighed.

“Yeah. Okay. I’m coming.” He said and sat up, pushing her from his chest. She giggled and jumped off the bed. Rushing down the stairs to get to the tree first, she knocked into a sleepy Matty who emerged from his room rubbing at his half-closed eyes.

“Hey!” he shouted after her.

Louis sat up and put his legs on the floor. He glanced back and reached for Harry under the covers. His fingers touched Harry’s thigh and Harry yelped. He sat up and glared at Louis.

“Your hands are cold.” He said and pushed the covers off himself. Louis stood up and walked in their ensuite, only wearing tiny briefs. Harry yawned and followed him. He plastered himself at Louis’ back and started kissing up from his shoulder blades to his neck, nipping at the skin.

“Ahhh…Harry. Wait.” Louis mumbled and gripped his toothbrush. Harry grabbed his hips and swayed forward, brushing his hard-on against Louis’ bum. “It’s not fair.” Harry smirked against Louis’ skin, pressing soft kisses to the side of his neck.

“What? I’m just being friendly.”

“There’s nothing friendly about your dick digging into my arse, Harold.” Louis complained, biting a smile. Harry giggled and prodded him once more. Louis put down his toothbrush and turned around. He leaned back on the porcelain sink and stared down at Harry who was biting on the inside of his cheek, trying to keep the mood thick and arousing. Louis winked before jumping on him and tugging down his briefs. Harry helped him, then shucked Louis’ pair to the side along with his and pulled him in for open mouthed kiss. He pushed him against the sink and pressed their hips together. They rutted against each other quick and dirty, searching for the release in the haze of the morning. They breathed in each others faces as they came and Louis bit on Harry’s bottom lip.

They showered quickly and got dressed before joining their children in the living room. When they finally got downstairs, Amelia was half-way through her pile of presents, looking at a box with drawing board in it. Matty was examining two new video games and smiling to himself. Amelia rushed over to them and pulled them towards the mess of different sized boxes and ripped wrapping paper. They each opened the presents from Amelia and Matty, thanking them gleefully (they got matching belts). When Harry picked up a smaller one from his mum, Robin and Jack, Louis stood up and called him to the hallway.

Louis had his hands behind his back and he watched Harry with anticipation and hopefulness. Harry smiled at him, trying to calm him a bit. Louis took a deep breath.

“Harry, I just wanted…thank you for yesterday. The dinner was lovely and I had so much fun, seeing the other lads and my mum and sisters so… Thank you. You’re the best.” Louis said, stumbling over his words and trying to say everything he’s feeling at once. Harry cupped his cheek with his warm palm and brushed his finger over the top of it.

“You’re welcome, Lou.” He said softly, “you deserve it. I love you.”

Louis smiled brightly. “I love you too. And I’ve been having so much fun with Matty and Amelia. I swear that off time I got for the holidays was godsend. I’m so so happy. With them and with you. And all I keep thinking about is…how quickly they’ve grown and how cute they were as babies and I…” he brought his hand forward and showed Harry a small packet, nicely wrapped in silver with a white bow, “I wanted to talk to you about it, so… I got you this.” He placed the box in Harry’s hand while Harry looked at him with slight confusion. He carefully opened the box and lifted the small lid. Harry breathed in sharply in astonishment; quickly catching up with Louis’ words and implication behind them.

He looked up at Louis’ anxious eyes and blinked away the happy tears. He picked up the white woollen baby sized socks and choked on a laugh that involuntarily escaped his throat.

“You-you want another baby?” he asked, so he can be sure there’s no mistake. Louis smiled, delighted at Harry’s reaction. He nodded and took one sock from Harry’s hand.

“Yes, Harry. I would like another baby. If… if that’s what you want too?”

Tears spilled from Harry’s eyes and he hugged Louis tightly. “I want another baby too. Wait. Is this why you disappeared in _Frenchgate_ that day?"

"Yeah." Louis grinned, "I couldn't tell you where I went! It'll ruin the surprise."

"We're gonna daddies. Again. You're gonna be Daddy Lou. Again."   
"Harry, you're the only one who calls me Daddy Lou. Even the kids didn't catch up with the nickname. It's cute," he said catching Harry's affronted stare, "but it's not working. Sorry, babe."  
Harry shrugged. "I don't care. You're a dad and you're my Lou. You'll always be Daddy Lou."

Amelia found them few minutes later, hugging and smiling dopily at each other while looking at a too small pair of socks. She invited them back in the living room, urging them to open all the rest of presents. Harry started to clean the empty boxes and wrapping paper which was all over the living room. Louis offered to make them all tea.

All four of them were huddled together on the couch, sipping their tea and talking about what they’ll do when they come to Grandma Anne’s house tomorrow. Harry shared a look with Louis over his children’s heads and smiled knowingly.

 

Thinking back on that Christmas morning, it cleared to Harry: _It could not get better than this._ Apart from all his success in his career he has never felt more accomplished. And happy.

**Author's Note:**

> The poem is by Croatian poet Dragutin Tadijanovic.(because I'm a horrible person who has to push my country's customs and people in stories) It sounds much better in Croatian to be honest. 
> 
> Happy holidays, people! (have some of Harry's cookies at the exit)


End file.
